Team Beachbody Guest

I had been boney all my life. All through school and most of my adult life. When I went to the 8th grade I weighed only 55 lbs, I did not really gain any weight until after I had my first child, I reach 105 lbs and stay their even after having my forth son. I gain a total of 20 lbs during each pregancy, lost it all in the delivery room. I could not get rid of the belly fat, but in all I remained thin.

I remember being called 'Bag of bones, skinning benny' all throuhg Elementary and high school. As an adult, I would say around the age of 22, remember there was a rumor that I was on "crack". When I was a work, other women would say that they hated me because I was so skinny. They did not want to eat lunch with me or walk around the building with me. At my job, there were footprints going around the building indicating a walk path. most people would walk during there lunch break. I was very upset about the rumor and I was tired of being teased and being hated about being so skinny. I decided to gain weight. I started gaining weight. I was not being teased any more, people would hang out with me now. But, somewhere in this picture when I thought that I had reached my ideal weight, the weight just kept piling on and each year weight would go up an additional 5 pounds. Now, I was trying to maintain and stop gaining.

What went wrong. This year I gained a whopping 30 pounds after years of trying to maintain and stop gaining weight. All I have accomplished was to through my whole body out of balance. It has really gotten out of control. I still appear to be small to others. People look at me dis-belief if I say that I am going to workout or that I am trying to watch what I eat. They do not see the rolls of fat under my clothes. Clothes can hide a lot. I do become unhappy with myself and my appearance, sometimes. It is starting not to be important to me anymore, because I have a friend
who has crones disease. She is in the hospital at least two weeks of each month in the year. I just thank God that I can eat because, She has been close to death a few times and has lost alot of weight because she can not hold down any food. I have seen her cry because she is so hungry but is afraid to eat, because it hurts for her to eat.

I love my friend, but now she makes me feel like I am big with her commits. She act like she has never been big. She brags a lot about how small she is. She and I have switch rolls. I am big now, she is small, she is were
I use to be, not as small as I was, but not over weight any more. The only difference is, I have never made her feel like she was big or like she makes me feel now. At one
time we both use to talk about weight. She wanted to lose weight. I wanted to gain. But now she just criticize
me about how I have gain so much weight and how I am always on a diet. The funny thing is, I never bring up the
subject of weight, she does. So, I just look at her, and say 'Anyway' an change the subject. I still love her, she is my friend. I do not think she even knows how harsh her words can be and how it affects me. I forgive her. I
just want her to be well. I also want to be well. Well rid of this excess weight and have a better life without risks of heart attacks and diebetes.

My aunt just past from having 2 heart attacks; she also found out that she had diebetes before she past away, she was 69.

I got to my all time highest weight of 167 lbs. I use to work out delingently, 5 day a week, 1 hour each day by joining the gym at work, I could workout during my lunch break. They had palites, strenght training, weight training, step, cardio and kick boxing classes. Before I quit a dance class was added. I did it all. But instead of losing weight I continue to gain weight.

I would do cleanses and detox programs. You can
call me Mrs. GNC., because I am constantly buying and trying everything to become regular and buying and trying everything just to loss weight. Even, down to taking laxatives. The last product bought from a imfomercial was Slim Seduction. Now, P90X. I would like to loose about 40 lbs. I would also like get toned, have more strenght and flexability.

I am a child of God and I know and believe that all things work together for the good to them who love him. I just need a little encouragement. I had almost ran out of the will to keep trying. I would loose but then I would gain it all back. Maybe this program with P90X will
be the encouragement I need. And maybe this time the weight will stay off. I am just going to take it one step at a time.

Valerie Cook.